A Hot And Necessary Shower

A Hot and Necessary shower

I
Turn  a handle
And  a flood
Falls  
Down
My Body drifts
When it hears
The
Sound
This, Grime that clings to me
Seems to sink into me
Soon I will erase.
The day now done,
Sleep soon to come.
The water steams
And
I'm halfway to a world of dreams.
I step into the cleansing flow

And that’s when everything goes wrong.
You see,
Suddenly my brain turns on
And Like the sound of a loudening gong
My calm is Shattered
Not that it mattered
Thoughts flood in
And in the Din
I cant even hear myself THINK!
Recipe, Customer, Phone
T.V., Computer, DRONE!
Insecurity, shame
Fleeting thoughts of fame(As if)

On and on and on it goes
And
Frustration rises in my throat
And
Just like that,
Diversity breaks for conformity
And
Diamonds turn to dust
And a beautiful moment is lost.

Am I the only one who sees a trend?
'Couldn’t maybe WE be the ones to bend?

I'm not afraid to say it
And
Then again I am
But I
Have a confession to make

You see
I lie I cheat I steal
The hate I feel is real
And
It just gets worse
For that is Adams curse
This sin that stains my soul

Because of IT
I am dead to rights
Because of IT
I have given up so many  fights
My record stands 0 to infinity
In awe of divinity
That…
That would take me in still
And
Wash me clean
From this grime that clung to me
Sunk so deep into me
A beggar in the street
And still he took me in
Chose me
At my worst
On my way to the grave in a hearse

And
still…
Still after all
I am still AFRAID?
What would it take for me to say HEY!
Jesus loves you
And
Jesus loves me this I know
For the bible tells me so
Little ones to him belong
We are weak but he is
Stronger than our greatest dread
Greater than the trials ahead
Wise enough to see our need
Loving enough to hear our plea
But what would it take
To share where Christ has laid his stake?

Cause I am a slave who was set free
I am a blind man who now can see
So why can’t I go
And sing about it?

I am still Scared
Standing now before
This imaginary audience in my head
Shielded by the soapy threads
As I run my fingers through my hair
I’ll do it tomorrow I swear.

And so my shower ends
Feeling no cleaner than before.